We all fall prey to
the temptation to stereotype people. I know I do, although I try very hard not
to, from time to time a thought will creep into my head before I squash it
down. We have all heard them, Americans
are brash (actually very few of the Americans I know fall into this
stereotype), Irish stupid (again I have not met that many), British are drunkards
(there is truth in the fact that the British like to drink but I think few
actually ever get drunk), Germans efficient and unfeeling (efficient yes,
unfeeling, not that I have noticed), French elegant lotharios (most the French I
know well are happily married and very straight laced, some are elegant but many are not), women can’t drive or
read maps (really!) and so it goes on.
behind one of these shops lurks an unfriendly smile... |
Stereotypes persist,
however, and I came across one the other day in the most bizarre of
locations. I wear a very particular
brand of underwear. I can get it easily in
some department stores or online in the UK and some specialist stores in
Kazakhstan stocked it. Sadly neither
Miri nor Ipoh have a lingerie shop that sells my preferred brand. Since it has
been nearly 2 years since I was able to purchase some of these essentials I was
contemplating placing a mail order when my husband saw a brand outlet in a mall
in KL. On our next trip down I made a
beeline for the store expecting to be able to stock up to my heart’s
content.
I gave the shop
assistant my measurements (both British and European) and, without even looking at me properly she said ‘you can't have that size, too small,' up until this point I thought she just had a very good eye and I had expanded a little, but she ruined the illusion by continuing 'you are European, Europeans are all larger than Malaysian women’. I must admit to being
rather shocked – store assistants are usually trained to flatter the purchasers
not to insult them! In any event while I
may not be as slim as I was aged 18 I am the same size as I was at 28 and while
I expect to put on a little weight as I move towards my 40s I don’t intend to
buy clothes that don’t fit me now just in case!
I would not have
minded, genuinely not have minded if the woman had asked to take measurements
because she wanted to double check as I don’t want to spend money on something
that I can’t use. I don’t even mind
being told that in general Asian women are more petite than Europeans because
that is, generally true and I would be a fool to be offended by that. I was, however, rather shocked that a woman (who was,
incidentally, larger than me – not that size should matter at all but I found
it amusing given the point she was trying to make) refused to sell me something I had asked for based on my ethnicity. I decided not to
buy anything at all in the shop, I did consider writing to the brand’s regional
manager but I don’t want to get the woman in trouble and she might have had a
bad day or a particularly unpleasant customer just before me or she might even (and this is a stretch as she was very coherent) have had trouble expressing herself in English. In any event I will give the store the benefit of the doubt and sort out a mail order or get my
sister to post some stuff out to me.
This stereotyping
only concerned clothing, nothing of real import, but it still left me quite
bemused and a little upset (until my husband and I decided it was just
amusing), I can only imagine how terrible it must be for someone to have their
professional, personal or moral credentials and abilities questioned on the
basis of their origins. I will be making
extra effort to question it whenever I hear others make such statements.
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